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Screw Argentina, Let’s Go to Uruguay!

July 5, 2011

Recently, to brighten up the interior, the residence handyman put up a variety of indigenous-looking masks on the walls. I’m convinced that they have already started laying curses. Unequivocal evidence is that my room’s light switch just broke. Therefore, I’m writing by candlelight. With ink and quill, etc. In other news, it got cold here. Muaaaa…Here are some off-kilter pictures to match my strange, winter-when-it-should-be-summer-induced mood swings.

Amurrica! Oh, wait, what country am I in?

Is this legal in the U.S.?

Yes. Empanadas are THAT important here, constituting approximately 68% of the Argentine economy.

I thought it was just my residence. But no, this is the kind of key they use everywhere in the city. Really secure, I'm sure.

If we aren't 100% splendid, your money back, guaranteed!

A clothing store in Uruguay. I refuse to believe that they didn't know.

Fishing and bathing prohibited in docking zone

A more effective signage strategy: Onomatopoeia

Ad at a bus stop. I guess their faces were just that offensive.

It was a pretty posh restaurant, so I don't think anything was lost in translation.

Tourism in Argentina

Pirates are surprisingly sensitive about their weight, as it turns out.

As a mechanical engineering student, I wanted to interrogate this guy about his fully-motorized skateboard.

Near the place of work of my friend Ulises, scrap metal sculptures:

You may have noticed that some of the pictures above were from Uruguay. Given that I’ve indicated my residence in Argentina, the only four logical conclusions would be

  1. I went to Uruguay with a photographic device, whose data I later transferred to the inter-tubes,
  2. Someone else took these pictures, which I have shamelessly robbed,
  3. Someone stole my photographic device, took pictures, then returned it to me following anonymous threats to their health, or
  4. I’m not actually writing this blog

Since I’m Fair and Balanced, and tell the Other Side of the Story, I’ll let you decide which of the item #1’s above is correct.

Regardless of the source of these elicit photos, they are on display below. Because I know the Mainstream, Liberal Media won’t cover this. Because they are biased and unbalanced, and compose a vast majority of the overall media viewership, and I’m just a small fish in a big sea, trying to save this nation from the perils of a valueless, socialist society. We took a boat to get there.

The Titanic

The seats were strangely arranged like an airplane, even though there seemed to be no need for that.

I'm not sure why they print the 20 Peso bills upside down. Someone should really say something.

We toured the beaches. It’s off-season now, so we were the only people in all the places we went.

Lileni in Colonia

Colonia ocean front

Colonia street view. These flowers were a common sight.

Our resident Mexican chess master

Some adorable old man who I thought would make the picture better

We paid about negative $0.15 to ascend the tower.

We had a really, really expensive lunch.

There was a custody dispute over this old car we found. It got messy.

South America is different

A brief pit stop during the night in Montevideo to wait for a bus:

Service really sucked, but food was excellent.

We then headed for Punta del Diablo, a precious beach town that was zen-like in its tranquility during the off-season.

Must Love Dogs

Possibly due to a spill, dead and almost dead penguins were tragically washing up on shore.

We laid out to bask like lizards in the sun on the rocks

I got a new app for my iPod. Let’s see if you can guess.

Click on me! It's like a massage for pictures.

I’m still trying to figure out how to minimize the blurriness, but I figured I’d still include the picture.

Where's Pamela Anderson?

Dog begging my food

In Punta del Este, we found God:

The only interesting thing in Punta del Este

And then we left.

Here’s some cultural exposure around Buenos Aires.

Shoe polishing, a common sight

I finally tried máte, at work.

Máte is somewhat ritualistic. They drink it all day long and pass it around like a bong. Mostly, it just tasted like sugar water to me. Here is the Argentine equivalent of the White House:

Recently added light show on the Casa Rosada. Government money well-spent.

With some friends I went to an Armenian restaurant, which was a completely random choice as we were walking by. It turned out to be an entire cultural experience. For instance, I learned how much the Armenians hate the Turks. Might have been the genocide that ticked them off.

No to Turkey joining the EU

There was also a show! I was dragged up there at one point with the other men to learn how to dance Armenian-style.

Recent events in my life also include perusing the famous Feria de San Telmo. I bought hot sauce and a hat, which you will see later if you are not bored to death or struck down by a curse beforehand.

View from San Telmo

A café along the way

Another view of the antique interior

Our bill. No joke. And we had to collaborate with what seemed like all of the employees to make it happen.

Here are some street musicians from the market.

Also went to a cool restaurant (see In Case of Hungry poster above) with excellent food, and a super awesome bar that still has the lounge feel of the urban mansion it was converted from. See below.

My new hat, for those of you who are still conscious.

More recently, I met up with an American friend, Danny, who is studying here in BsAs. We went to an organic foods market that included a Parrilla (grill), which are as common here as empanadas.

Located near a train station


Abandoned bus

I also saw where a bunch of famous dead dudes were buried. Like Cesar.

Entrance to Recoleta Cemetery

Nearby, there was a fair. This included various forms of puppets.

The puppet master. Or rather, marionette. 

A mechanical flower made from airplane fuselage. Supposedly it opens and closes and has lights.

Well, my candle is burning low, so I have to wrap this up. Until next time, friends, and I hope you didn’t forget to hug an American Flag on the 4th. It really makes their day.


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One Comment
  1. Kelly permalink

    No mi di cuenta que eras tan gracioso cuando estabas en mi clase, Chris. ¡Qué chistoso que sos!

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